Category: Scammer pranks, Craigslist and Backpage pranks, prank calls
Characters: Billy, Russell
Prank Victim: Scammer
Rage Level: mellow
- “Whatever his name is, Robert… Downey… Senior”
- “Within 4-5 seconds you have overalls, you have pants, you got t-shirt, you got the suspenders on WA BANG BANG DIGGILY, BANG BANG.”
- “The MD5 majoogily”
Body of content:
I found an ad on Craigslist from a woman who claims to have millions of dollars to invest in ANY running business, and decided to call her up. This turned into a redneck prank call featuring Billy, the supposedly dumb hillbilly, and his attorney Russell. I told her that Billy has an incredible invention, sure to make millions in no time!
She bought the ridiculous invention story, and the fact that Billy claimed to be on the show ‘Shark Tank’, without any kind of proof! Worse yet, she was willing to screw Billy out of tons of money with the help of Russell. Don’t worry, Billy got the last word! What do you think this lady does if people agree to get her investment help? Do you think Billy scared her out of scamming? Tell me your thoughts in the comments!
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Pranker [speaking as Billy]: Hi there, I saw your advertisement on the Craiglisting about the uh, The Millions to spend anywhere.
Pranker: Uh, it says here er-, seeking to purchase a business that is up and running millions to invest in a profitable business.
Pranker: Okay, alright, so-, so you have millions of dollars, right?
Lady: I have a friend who got millions of dollars, and I'm helping him out with this.
Pranker: OH, okay so you're like the middle wom-, uh-, m-, MAN but woman in this scenario-
Lady: I-, yes I am. What kind of business is this?
Pranker: Okay, basically, are you familiar with the show Shark Tank?
Pranker: Okay, I just came back from that show, unfortunately I am under a non-disclosure agreement er-, from talking too much about it-
Pranker: but if I get good vibes from you, I might just kind of fill you in on some details, uh-
Pranker: Basically, I have kind of a DEVICE here that kind of helps you, uh-, SPEED UP, the getting ready process in the morning, right now-
Pranker: it's kind of geared towards MEN, but it could also kind of be TRANSITIONED over for FEMALES and such as well, I've PANTENTED and CREATED-
Pranker: a DEVICE that allows you to just WAKE UP in the morning you step outside on the platform, and withing 4-5 seconds, you have OVERALLS-
Pranker: you have PANTS, you got er-, T-SHIRT, you got the SUSPENDERS, on wuh-, BANG BANG DIGGILY, BANG BANG.
Lady: HOW is that possible?
Pranker: Well, think of-, have you seen the movie IRONMAN?
Pranker: Okay, you know how THAT GUY, whatever his name is, uh-, ROBERT uh-, DOWNEY, uh-, SENIOR HOPS ON THE PLATFORM and then he comes on there-
Pranker: he's like uh-, BULULULU BAM, he's dressed.
Pranker: Uh-, I wanted to kind of just er-, I'm-, I have MY-, MY-, my lawyer here, who's also my COLLEAGUE who's been working on this with me and kind of handling-
Lady: the BUSINESS side, he could give you PROBABLY S-, uh-, a bit more details about it, if you-, if you're DOWN to talk to him for a minute or two is that okay?
Pranker: Okay, one second-, [cue switch FX], [speaking to someone in the background] Hey Russell, can you talk-, come here and talk to her.
Pranker [speaking as Russell]: Uh, hello?
Pranker: Yeah, hey, how you doing? What's your name?
Pranker: Beverly, hey, this is Russell, I'm actually, uh-, his colleague and also kind of representing him uh-, for legal matters in regards to his CONTRACTS and kind of UPCOMING-
Pranker: uh-, agreements he has going on, but let me go ahead and step outside here for a second.
Pranker [speaking to Billy in the background]: Hey, Billy? I'll-, I'll be right back, okay? Just-, I'm having bad reception in here. [speaking as Billy] Alrighty.
Pranker [speaking as Russell]: Uh-, yeah, so, basically, like he was kind of telling you he-, he was on the Shark Tank Show and they really displayed some interest, they wanted to-
Pranker: uh-, do you know Kevin Durant?
Pranker: Yeah, he showed some VERY, VERY high interest in the product and uh-, he kind of, he wanted to, he put down some money to back it. I don't know how this Hillbilly guy got this-
Pranker: crap together, but, he really did a good job, they were fascinated on the show and they think, that it could be something that people we use day-day in a couple of years from now.
Lady: Now [exhales], I'm trying to think of questions, here uh-, HOW MUCH, would one need to invest in this, particular uh-, product?
Pranker: I can convince this idiot to sell it to you guys for SUPER CHEAP, as long as we SPLIT the profits, me and you, or whoever else is, gonna be involved.
Lady: Oh yeah?
Lady: And then-
Pranker: And then even ha-
Lady: after that-
Pranker: Ha-, Hasabro's show some interest already that they wanted to kind of c-, Hop-On this early, so after that, we could LITERALLY, PROBABLY, sell the idea to Hasabro outside of Billy's-
Pranker: involvement whatsoever within a week-
Pranker: And-, I'm just saying, at-, at his point I mean, I've been dealing with him for a while for the past two months as he's had to like travel to the shows so it me and him, are-, are-, pretty close-
Pranker: so I mean, I could tell him to close his eyes and sign something and he'd probably do it.
Pranker: One love, well-
Lady: OH, kay.
Pranker: You and I need to be a hundred-, 110% clear about, you know, we need to pay him off, he makes his money, the-, the CONTRACT is signed, we're gonna cut him out and then you and I are gonna, you know-
Pranker: really be caking off of this. Y-, you okay with that?
Pranker: Alright! Okay, great! UHM, I mean, I just, just don't try to screw me over too, just Billy.
Lady: Mhm, now, I know, I can't screw you over, you're an attorney, right?
Pranker: Yeah, that's right. That's a good point.
Lady: I wouldn't dare.
Pranker: He's just a dumb HILLBILLY, he won't know the difference, he'll be SATISFIED HAPPY, and won't-, and you know, it'll be squared away, I can send you those documents, it's no problem at all, I'll get everything you-
Lady: You have a picture of the product or you can't reveal that yet?
Pranker: Uh, yeah, well, in the-, in the PATENT APPLICATION and stuff, y-, you know, y-, you'll see some of the drawings and Schematics and, and, if I can find an actual COMPILED image that I can give to you guys, that's-
Pranker: not gonna be an issue either, but uh, this DUMBASS just needs to be out of the picture at this point because he doesn't know what he's doing and he's just holding things UP.
Lady: OH send me over what you got, you know, I'm serious.
Pranker: I'll get those papers drafted for this morn-, uh-, ho-, hold on-, one second he-, he's coming outside here, one second, [speaking to someone in the background]: Hey what's going on? [speaking as Billy]: Uh, not-, nothing-
Pranker: so-, w-, what's the status, are ya'll moving forward with this, or-, w-, what's happening? I haven't heard anything from you, you've been outside the whole time. [speaking as Russell]: Yeah, yeah, w-, we're just kind of getting-
Pranker: getting this squared away, right now, and-, and the final paperwork but it-, it's looking good, she seems really interested in the product, and uh-, yeah! [speaking as Billy]: Well, LET-, LET ME TALK TO HER and just EH-, I just wanna-
Pranker: feel comfortable, you know? [speaking as Russell]: Yeah, that's understandable, alright, l-, let me ask her, real quick. [speaking to lady]: Hey uh, he wants just to chat with you I guess for another minute or two and I-
Pranker: I have your e-mail now and then I'll go ahead and send you the stuff-, w-, we disscused, a-, and the uh-, the-, you know, the-, the MD-, MD5 MAJOOGILY and uh, j-, just talk to him for a second, okay? This gonna make us rich, hold on one second.
Pranker [speaking to Billy]: Here you go. [speaking as Billy]: Alrighty, hello?
Pranker: Y-, hi there, so-, so did my buddy kind of explain to you w-, w-, what's HAPPENING here?
Pranker: Alrighty-, a-, and-, and we're TALKING LIKE some BIG TIME MONEY?
Pranker: Sounds good to me, and, I would like to MOVE FORWARD with this, so-, so is he gonna go ahead and send that information over?
Lady: UH-, basically-
Lady: Yeah, your guy need to send me, you know, what he got, and then uhm-, we'll take it from there, yeah.
Pranker: W-, one more-, one more thing-, [music platying] WHY ARE YOU TRYNA SCAM ME?! I HEAD THAT WHOLE ENTIRE CONVERSATION, YALL ARE TRYNA-
Pranker: CUT UNDER ME, TAKE THE PRODUCT, THAT I'VE BEEN WORKING FOR MY ENTIRE LIFE, HOW COULD YOU DO THAT TO ME? HOW COULD YOU DO THAT TO ME [music playing]
Lady: Th-, that's YOUR FRIEND-
Pranker: WELL NO-
Lady: That's not me-
Pranker: You-, you-
Lady: That's your-
Pranker: YOU S-, I TOLD YOU ABOUT MY IRONMAN SUIT, I TOLD YOU, HOW LONG I SPENT ON IT, I PUT MY-
Pranker: SWEAT and TEARS-
Pranker: into that thing-
Lady: that's your-
Pranker: and you just wanna-
Lady: that's your-
Pranker: take it from me, no.
Lady: that's YOUR ATTORNEY is the one, that's trying to-
Lady: SCAM YOU.
Pranker: I HEARD EVERYTHING-
Lady: I'm not-
Pranker: Okay, you said you were DOWN you heard-
Pranker: the dollar bills CHA CHING CHING CHINGING and all up in your BRAIN CELLS, and you just wanted to do it [music playing], you dun-
Lady: I ASKED HIM WHY WOULD HE-
Lady: DO THAT?
Pranker: DUN DIDDLY DOO DAW BU DUN DEE DAW SCAMMING ME [music playing in the background] I'M-, I WASN'T BORN YESTERDAY, okay?
Lady: [Hang up]
Pranker: Hel-, hello? [laughing] [speaking to audience] She hung up! I think I was yelling to much. [laughing]