Category: Restaurant prank
Characters: Rakesh, Abdo
Prank Victim: Pizza shop
Rage Level: Moderate
- “Can you do me one favor? Can you hold the food poison this time?”
- (Holding back tears) “I wish I could give you ZERO STARS!”
- “I will pour you a glass of my DEW MOUNTAIN”
Body of content:
I was tipped off that the customer service at this pizza shop was terrible and that the employees are SUPER rude, so of course I had to give them a call! I called as Rakesh to make a complaint, and they immediately showed their lack of service skills - I knew this pizza prank was going to be hilarious!
The manager of the pizza shop gets sassy with Rakesh right away, and seems personally offended through the whole prank! It was torture trying not to laugh during these calls, the guy’s frustration and reactions were just too funny. I hope no one ever has a real issue with their pizza at this place because the workers are nuts!
Imagine if someone who sounds like Rakesh showed up to this store! How do you think they would react? What was your favorite Rakesh line from this prank? Tell me in the comments!
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[phone calling sound]
Pizza lady: Thanks for calling [BOOP] This is Becky
Pizza lady: How can I help you?
Pranker: Yes, hello Becky, may I talk to Douglas, please?
Pizza lady: Douglas isn't here
Pranker: OH RIGHT. So he's the best person to talk about
Pranker: Uhh problem with the food, rrright?
Pizza lady: Uhm yeah, you can speak to him or you can
Pizza lady: Speak to our manager
Pranker: OH! Okay, let me say hello to manager right no'
Pizza lady: Okay!
Pizza lady: Alright.
Manager: This is Zack, can I help you?
Pranker: Yes, hello, I am calling, I wanted to talk to
Pranker: Douglas, about EHH, experience I have it with the food
Pranker: I come to getting TWO CARRY-OUT PIZZA, BUT PIZZA
Pranker: When I get it was very cold, and on top of THAT
Pranker: Duh, duh the bread was not tasting good
Manager: And, when did you order this?
Pranker: This was maybe TWO, TWO days ago
Manager: Uhm, you'll have to call back tomorrow, and next time
Manager: You'll have to call the day of
Manager: Not two days later
Pranker: But, you know I just got little bit caught up
Pranker: And then you know I having actually, the food
Pranker: Little bit DIGESTION ISSUE, so I was waiting to
Pranker: Call back at a good time, right?
Manager: Kay, you'll have to call back tomorrow between-
Manager: At 1 o'clock
Pranker: To talk to Douglas, or why?
[phone call ends]
Manager: Thanks for calling [BOOP] This is Zack, can I help you?
Pranker: Hello? Do you hang up on me right now?
Manager: I can BARELY understand you
Pranker: DO YOU HANG UP ON ME RrrIGHT NOW?
Manager: Yeah, I told you you can call back tomorrow, at 1 o'Clock
Pranker: BUT LA- LADY TOLD ME you can help me too, right?
Manager: I'm not the owner of the store so you'll have to call back
Pranker: But, I know
Manager: AT ONE O'CLOCK
Pranker: But you are manager, right?
Manager: YES I AM, but this is a different issue, you need to
Manager: Call back tomorrow AT ONE O'CLOCK
Pranker: BUT THEN IT WILL BE 3-4 DAYS right, I don't want to
Pranker: Wait too long, right?
Manager: You can CALL BACK TOMORROW AT ONE O'CLOCK
Pranker: Okay, but can I have customer service please?
Pranker: I don't know WHY MANAGER but you are being little-bit AS*HOOLE
Pranker: To me, right?
Manager: Okay, goodbye! [hangs up phone]
Pranker: ERR, wHAT? Hello? [laughs]
Pizza lady: Thanks for calling [BOOP] This is Becky, how can I help you?
Pranker: Hello Becky, can I have cell-telephone number for Douglas, please?
Pizza lady: UHH WE ABSOLUTELY DO NOT GIVE OUT cell phone numbers
Pizza lady: Here, that is ridiculous
Pranker: No, no, but
Pizza lady: You should know that
Pranker: No, but I-
Pizza lady: THANK YOU HAVE A NICE
Pranker: But look-
Pizza lady: EVENING DON'T CALL BACK [phone call ends]
Pranker: BAH, BUT YOU WERE BEING BITCH TO ME TOO, hello? [laughs]
Manager: Thanks for calling [BOOP] This is Zack, can I help you?
Pranker: Hello, can I talk to Douglas, please?
Manager: He's not here.
Pranker: But, you are the guy I talked to yesterday, and you told me
Pranker: To call back today, right?
Manager: At 1 o'clock, it is.. 3:27
Pranker: RIGHT. But, you know, but he-, he only working for two hour?
Manager: He was only here until 1 o'Clock on the afternoon
Pranker: But you told me to call AFTER ONE, right?
Pranker: Like he's coming in at one
Manager: I told you to call AT 1 o'Clock
Pranker: Kay, WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME call before 1
Manager: Multiple times!
Pranker: Why didn't you say before one, right?
Manager: BECAUSE WE ARE BUSY WE ARE A RESTAURANT
Manager: We have BUSINESS before then
Manager: I TOLD YOU
Pranker: I understand
Manager: 1 O'CLOCK
Pranker: But, yeah, you could’ve TELL ME call by 1 o'clock
Manager: NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Manager: Because I told you 1 o'Clock
Pranker: MOTHER YUCKER DON'T STOP IT
Pranker: Do you-
Manager: I told you 1 o'Clock
Pranker: No, you told-, YEAH, YOU SAID cALL AFTER 1 O'CLOCk
Pranker: Right? So now I want-
Manager: I SAID ONE
Pranker: Err, WHY WOULD- what makes-
Manager: I AM NOT GONNA ARGUE WITH YOU, SIR
Pranker: WHAT MAKES YOU TINK I WILL SIT THERE AT 1 O'CLOCK
Pranker: EXACTLY RIGHT, JUST SO I CAN PICK UP TELEPHONE
Pranker: And-, and-, call you-, YOU WERE SO MEAN TO ME,
Pranker: YESTERDAY, RIGHT?
Manager: YOU are calling me names! I HAVE EVERY RIGHT TO GET M-
Manager: MEAN WITH YOU
Pranker: Look-, YOU-, I ONLY CALLE YOU, A NAME AFTER YOU MAKE
Pranker: AS*HOLE BEHAVIOR, right? I don't use it-
Manager: NO, I TOLD YOU MULTIPLE TIMES TO CALL 1 o'Clock
Manager: And you just kept going ON and ON and ON and ON
Pranker: Okay, look MOTHER YUCKER
Manager: I TOLD YOU 1 o'Clock
Pranker: PIZZA will cost you $1.22 ¢
Pranker: You cannot make happy customer-
Manager: YOU UNDERSTAND YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT YOU'RE
Manager: TALKING ABOUT, RIGHT?
Pranker: I know what I'm talking about
Manager: NO YOU DON'T
Pranker: I DO! I know what ingredient cost it-, right?
Manager: NO YOU DON'T
Pranker: I go to supermarket-
Manager: HOW MUCH DOES IT COST? A DOLLAR?
Manager: You know, how much it costs us to make a pizza?!
Manager: It's not a dollar
Pranker: OKAY, TWO DOLLAR, THREE DOLLAR, whatever, it is
Pranker: DEFINITELY not going to BREAK the BANK, right?
Pranker: You can do it
Manager: I AM NOT GIVING YOU FREE FOOD because you
Manager: Should've called back the day of, and you're being
Manager: COMPLETELY RUDE with me, and I am just DONE with you.
Pranker: What is your name?
Manager: My name is Zack, I am a manager of the store
Pranker: Yeah, I know, okay, I'm going to go on, I'm going to have
Pranker: Everybody in my CALL CENTER go leave you a-,
Pranker: Review on THE YELP for the CRAP CRAP CUSTOMER RELATION
Manager: OKAY, go right ahead!
Pranker: Okay, I want you-, I am asking you, YOU ARE A MANAGER, right?
Manager: I am the manager
Pranker: Okay, how did you try to resolve for me?
Manager: I TOLD YOU TO CALL BACK tomorrow at 1 o'Clock
Manager: And talk to the owner of the store. YOU DIDN'T WANNA LISTEN
Pranker: Look, you yell at me, and told me, I should've CALL AT THAT DAY
Pranker: Then you say call after 1 o'Clock, I simply ask
Pranker: You are a manager, right? You have ERR POSITION of MANAGEMENT
Pranker: You can do for me, right?
Manager: WHAT THATE did you-, you came in here and got food
Manager: Or did you got it, taken to you?
Pranker: My wife, she come to PICK IT UP, we got one EHH
Pranker: Pepperoni Pizza, right?
Manager: And this gave you food poisoning?
Pranker: RIGHT. I was in BATROOM all day yesterday,
Pranker: BOOM BOOM BOOM ALL DAY, I WAS SITTING ON THE TOILET
Manager: I CAN'T PROVE THAT YOU EVEN HAD FOOD POISONING
Manager: So I'm not giving you FREE FOOD
Pranker: Kay, so you working
Manager: AND IF YOU DID HAVE FOOD POISONING WHY WOULD YOU WANT
Manager: FREE FOOD ANYWAY?
Pranker: Cuz it is the principle, right? I will go give it
Pranker: To somebody I hate-
Manager: THAT MAKES NO SENSE
Pranker: I will give it to somebody I dislike, right, to show them
Pranker: The pain I had to go through it
Manager: OH YOU'RE HILARIOUS DO NOT CALL BACK
Pranker: What do you mean-
Manager: DO NOT
Pranker: Mother yucker
Manager: CALL BACK
Pranker: I WANTING MY REFUNDING, [phone call ends] hallo?! [laughs] He got offended personally about the pizza!
Pranker: HELLO LOOK. I think we got off on the wrong foot.
Pranker: I wanting to
Manager: I'M NOT PUTTING UP WITH YOU.
Pranker: NO. NO LOOK-, okay I know
Manager: SO I AM DONE!
Pranker: Look it-
Manager: I AM DONE!
Manager: Do you understand me?
Pranker: STOP IT!
Manager: I am done!
Pranker: STOP IT!
Manager: If you call back, I WILL CALL THE POLICE.
Pranker: STOP IT! Stop it right no'! Okay I wanting
Manager: GOODBYE. [hangs up phone]
Pranker: MOTHERYUCKER! [making weird sounds]
[hangs up phone]
Pranker: Uh yeah hello! UH, do you guys have a SHARGE
Pranker: For the delivery?
Pizza guy: Yes we do!
Pranker: Okay uh, how much is that?
Pizza guy: It depends on where you're at!
Pranker: OKAY BUT- Like generally it's like a couple dollars? Or like a lot
Pranker: Like 5-6?
Pizza guy: It depends on where you're at.
Pranker: OH OKAY. Alright what kind of SBECIALZ do you have it right now?
Pranker: For like UH LARGE BIZZA? For like a family deal?
Pizza guy: We actually don't have any specials at the moment.
Pranker: Oh okay, so like all-, oh you-, you want to make the-
Pranker: OKAY HOLD ON, let me bass to my ROOMMATE. He will male the order.
Pranker: UH HELLO?
Pizza guy: Hello?
Praker: Yeah can we go ahead and have, 1 BBQ PIZZA, RIGHT?
Pizza guy: Okay
Pranker: And, one large, eh, we will do one large PEPPERONI PLEASE
Pizza guy: A large pepperoni, hand-tossed or crispy?
Pranker: Ooh, what do you recommend it?
Pizza guy: CRISPY.
Pranker: OK, yeah we will do 2 CRISPITUS
Pizza guy: Anything else?
Pranker: Can I get one drink too? 1 COCA-COLA?
Pizza guy: We have Pepsi products.
Pranker: Okay well, do you having uh, DEW MOUNTAIN?
Pizza guy: Mountain Dew?
Pizza guy: Anything else?
Pranker: Eh no but, can you do me one favor?
Pranker: Can you hold the FOOD POISON this time?
Pizza guy: THAT'S REALLY HILARIOUS. Did you actually want this order?
Pizza guy: Or do you not want this order
Pranker: NO I WANT IT! But I was hoping that you can do the COMPENSATE
Pranker: And CALL IT FREE! Right? I will pay delivery!
Pizza guy: Sir, I will give you the large pizza for free
Pizza guy: JUST CUZ I'M SICK OF DEALING WITH YOU
Pizza guy: But I would lo- I'd alsoo like an apology for calling me names
Pizza guy: That's my-, stance on it.
Pranker: Okay look, I have AGREEMENT. You can APOLOGIZE TO ME TOO!
Pranker: For being rude! And NOT NICE! And den I will-
Pizza guy: Sir I'm not gonna apologize to you
Pranker: No but look!
Pizza guy: FOR ANYTHING
Pizza guy: Because I'm giving you this pizza for free! I tried helping you!
Pizza guy: You just got extremely rude with me! And just calling me names.
Pizza guy: HOW DO YOU THINK THAT MAKES ME FEEL?
Pranker: NO BUT UH-, LOOK I-
Pizza guy: I did not call you names or anything,
Pranker: But you know what?
Pizza guy: And you were calling me names sir
Pizza guy: THAT'S NOT FAIR.
Pranker: I didn't want to tell you! But yesterday I was...
Pranker: After you guys left me. I was sitting in the corner!
Pranker: CRYING UPSET. Right I was sitting there, eh, SICK BOY!
Pranker: Right? Nobody want to help me OH FUNNY SOUNDING MAN
Pranker: Cannot do anything! HIPPTYHOP
Pizza guy: Sir you were calling me names! What do you how-
Pizza guy: How do you think that made me feel?
Pranker: But did-, did you cry too? CUZ I CRIED
Pizza guy: No I'm a man. I DON'T CRY.
Pranker: WHAT? So-
Pizza guy: I don't cry!
Pranker: So what you're saying I'M A WOMAN OR SOMETHING?
Pizza guy: No, I'm just saying that you shouldn't be crying
Pizza guy: Over this cuz it's not a big deal!
Pranker: I WISH I COULD GIVE YOU, ZERO STARS.
Pizza guy: See that right there IS JUST RUDE.
Pranker: But you see, you just told me! WHAT IS-
Pranker: Is it not rude to say I AM A MAN AND I DON'T CRY
Pranker: SO YOU ARE A WOMAN?
Pizza guy: I didn't say you were a woman! DO YOU WANT THIS PIZZA OR NOT?
Pizza guy: I am done talking to you.
Pranker: What a- TELL ME! What am I right? WHAT AM I?
Pranker: If i am not-, eh, GUYS DON'T CRY. I WAS CRYING. WHAT AM I THEN?
Pizza guy: SIR I'M ABOUT DONE WITH YOU! Do you want this pizza or not?
Pranker: STOP IT! I want both pizzas and the free drink, and delivery!
Pizza guy: You are gettin' the free ONE PIZZA AND THAT IS IT.
Pranker: OK BUT-
Pizza guy: The other you'll have to pay for.
Pranker: TELL ME I'M THE MAN, right? Say that to me, so I can feel
Pranker: Little bit better!
Pizza guy: YES YOU'RE A MAN! OKAY?
Pranker: NO! NO! NO! I'm- NO, NO, NO, I'm THE man!
Pizza guy: I would like an apology for being called
Pranker: NO, NO
Pizza guy: A SON OF A B*TCH, AND AN AS*HOLE!
Pranker: NO-, NO-, NO-, I'd- WOAH! RIGHT. I don't say-, I do not say
Pranker: SON OF BITITCH!
Pizza guy: YOU CALLED ME AN S.O.B. You're being an SOB and an as*hole
Pranker: NO! NO! NO!
Pizza guy: Exactly what you said.
Pranker: I DID NOT SAY THAT! Right? I DID NOT! BUT-, I will say sorry to you!
Pranker: If you tell to me RAKESH YOU ARE THE MAN!
Pranker: Cuz right now I feel like THE WOMAN.
Pizza guy: Pfft, sir you can just get your pizza if you'd like it
Pizza guy: If not I'm gonna hang up.
Pranker: Did you just LAUGH AT ME? Do you think it's funny?
Pizza guy: I-, THIS IS RIDICULOUS, do you want your pizza or not?
Pranker: LOOK OKAY. I wanting TWO PIZZAS RIGHT? Not-, NOT ONLY ONE.
Pizza guy: YOU'RE GETTIN THE ONE FOR FREE, the rest you gotta pay for.
Pranker: NO. No but look-, okay look. LOOK. But you called me a WOMAN
Pranker: Right? You made me cry! What-, we have to-
Pizza guy: I DID NOT CALL YOU A WOMAN!
Pranker: YES YOU DID. Right? You said that YOU ARE MAN. You don't cry!
Pizza guy: OH MY GOD...
Pranker: STOP IT. STOP IT. STOP IT. You know what you do to me
Pizza guy: YOU STOP IT!
Pranker: EH NO STOP IT.
Pizza guy: Where do you want this delivered to?
Pranker: OK, but. Can I come pick it up?
Pizza guy: Uh you said delivery, where do you want this delivered to?
Pranker: But that was MY ROOMMATE!
Pizza guy: I DON'T WANT you in my store.
Pranker: WA, WHA-, BUT.
Pizza guy: I'm sorry?
Pranker: I will come visit you right now and WE WILL HUG IT OUT.
Pizza guy: NO I DON'T WANT YOU IN MY STORE.
Pranker: NO-, SH-, SH-, SH-, SH-, SH-
Pizza guy: DO NOT COME HERE.
Pranker: STOP IT. STOP IT. LOOK. We will embrace! Right? I will
Pranker: WRAP MY ARMS AROUND YOU, give you like-
Pizza guy: NO DO NOT COME IN MY
Pranker: STOP IT!
Pizza guy: SIR? DO NOT COME TO MY STORE.
Pranker: BUT WHY NOT?
Pizza guy: We will deliver it to you.
Pranker: Look I know-, I will come to you! I will just give you a
Pranker: SMALL SMOOCHIE SMOOCHIE right?
Pizza guy: No I am busy sir.
Pranker: Sir but-
Pizza guy: We will bring it to you
Pranker: It will on-
Pizza guy: AT 5 O'CLOCK.
Pranker: It will only take, like THIRTY SECOND, right?
Pizza guy: I WILL GIVE YOU 30 SECONDS TO GIVE ME YOUR ADDRESS.
Pizza guy: Or I am hanging up and you are getting nothing.
Pranker: NO! NO! NO! STOP IT. STOP IT. STOP IT. STOP IT.
Pranker: STOP IT. LOOK. LOOK. LOOK. LOOK. LOOK. LOOK
Pranker: I WILL
Pizza guy: YOU GOT 28 SECONDS.
Pranker: LOOK! LOOK! LOOK! LOOK! I-, I will come there!
Pizza guy: 27
Pranker: AHH STOP IT!
Pizza guy: 26
Pranker: I don't have enough TIME RIGHT? I CANNOT- EH, TOO MUCH PRESSURE!
Pranker: STOP IT! Look I will come, I, I will come there, we will sit down together
Pranker: And I will share my PIZZAS WITH YOU! TWO PIZZAS!
Pizza guy: NO! You are not coming here sir! I told you do not get this for delivery
Pranker: LOOK! LOOK! LOOK!
Pizza guy: I am not giving it to you.
Pranker: LOOK! LOOK! I will pour you a glass,
Pizza guy: YOU HAVE 20 SECONDS.
Pranker: I will pour you a glass of MY DEW MOUNTAIN!
Pizza guy: 18 SECONDS! 17 16
Pizza guy: 15
*Lost it here*
Pizza guy: 14, you better give me your address or I am HANGING UP.
Pizza guy: I AM NOT KIDDING. I've already told Doug about this
Pizza guy: And he told me to do this! So if you do not give me your address
Pranker: No- BUT-
Pizza guy: I am not doing anything for you!
Pranker: BUT DON'T-, DON'T COUNT DOWN PLEASE. STOP IT.
Pizza guy: SIR I AM BUSY! I don't have time for this!
Pranker: Okay but look we have 30 more seconds! Just wait! LOOK.
Pranker: Just-, let me come there and we can sit down TOGETHER!
Pizza guy: NO! YOU ARE NOT COMING IN HERE!
Pranker: LOOK! Look just, I-, I just want to play game of ROCK PAPER SCISSORS, right?
Pranker: Just to have somebody to talk to.
Pizza guy: OKAY YOU'RE DONE. YOU'RE DONE. YOU.ARE.DONE.
Pranker: NO STOP IT-, HELLO SIR?