Category: Restaurant prank
Characters: Buk Lau
Prank Victim: Chinese restaurant
Rage Level: Mellow
- “I going to lick your a-noose todayy, very delish-”
- “Can I get one order of the suck-a-d*** chicken?”
- “That’s not Engrish…”
- “I come, it in the navigation system today, I very twenty first century tech-nolo-GEE!!”
Body of content:
This is a classic Chinese food prank call from my channel! I pranked this random restaurant during one of my live shows and I thought it turned out pretty hilarious. The woman who answers the phone is so difficult to understand, but I think she’s having just as hard of a time understanding Buk Lau!
I try to order a variety of made up dishes with completely outrageous names, and this lady goes along with it like nothing is unusual! Towards the end, I think she started to get just as much of a kick out of the call as I was, you can hear her chuckling a bit.
Would you like to see more crazy Chinese restaurant pranks? Do you have any funny ideas for weird food names? Tell me in the comments below!
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Restaurant lady: Mincading?
Pranker: Duh, hello?
Pranker: Duh, I want to make THE order today for the pick up please?
Restaurant lady: Yeah, okay, what do you like??
Pranker: Okay what the heck do you have for the SPE- SPE-CIAL?
Restaurant lady: Special?
Pranker: The-the yes
Restaurant lady: Uh, I- I-I have the menu??
Restaurant lady: Oooooh, everything on the menu what is ehh
Pranker: The- everything on the menu is a special today???
Pranker:... How the heck is that possible? Don’t lie to me big boy, tell-
Restaurant lady: Hold on, hold on, hold on, ho-hold on
Pranker: You are st-
Restaurant lady: Hold on hol-
Restaurant lady: O-OKAY. HOLD ON, HOLD ON
Pranker: AYYA, hah!
Pranker: Ah, [exhale]
[exhale] [ Asian music]
Restaurant lady: Hello???
Pranker: Duh hellooooo
Restaurant lady: Yup
Pranker: What do you have today for the-, special today?
Restaurant lady: OH NO, NOTHING I’M NOT NOT -
Pranker: [screaming] WHAT what the hell do you sell today for the special?
Restaurant lady: Not the thing. Everything is the same thing, nothing today is special.
Restaurant lady: Not the today special
Pranker: Everything, what is very delicious?
[phone making noise]
Restaurant lady: Buddha, special on the-on the menu
Restaurant lady:... The menu
Pranker: Duh, why the hell you [mumbling]so much? Calm down
Pranker:... big boy, look here, take your time, okay?
Pranker: We don't r-r-rush! This is not a race, to see who can finish, look.
Restaurant lady: YEAH I TOLD YOU!
Pranker: Do you have a big Coke today?
Restaurant lady: I have to cook today!
Pranker: Okay, okay, let me get the two order of the orange chicken....
Restaurant lady: Tw-two order chicken?!
Pranker: Two ooorder of the orange chicken
Restaurant lady: Mmhmm
Pranker: The three order of the big Coke extra large
Pranker: To drink
Restaurant lady: Auh only by the can
Pranker: You don’t have big Coke?
Restaurant lady: The cook the cook but can not not the large
Pranker: The how much money is that can?
Restaurant lady: One dollar each
Pranker: Like a someboodee what the heck man
Pranker: That is so much money, why the heck so expensive?
Restaurant lady: [breathing in to the phone microphone] what are you saying?! ONE DOLLAR EACH
Restaurant lady: NO CAN
Pranker: I go to the costco, I get the whole sale box for the-
Restaurant lady: YEAH
Restaurant lady: I know
Pranker: You under-
Restaurant lady: I know you [speaking in very bad english]
Restaurant lady: Man I know what’s wrong you know every one is one dollar each
Restaurant lady: That is too much money!
Restaurant lady: Yeah, uhh…
Pranker: I going to lick you’re a noose today very delish-
Pranker: Ok, let me get the two order of the spring roll..
Pranker: Can I get the one order of the sack a d*ck chicken?
Restaurant lady: What kind of chicken?
Pranker: The sack a d*ck chicken?
Pranker: The shoesine chicken!
Pranker: Do you have it?
Restaurant lady: WHAT KIND, I don't know what kind of chicken?
Pranker: The sesame chicken big boy calm down
Restaurant lady: OHHH SWEETSOUR CHICKEN BO?
Pranker: The yes not even that you stu- ok go good delicious.
Pranker: Do you sell, do you sell the swine flu chicken?
Restaurant lady: You told the, the o-order, two order orange chicken
Restaurant lady: Two spring roll
Restaurant lady: And?
Pranker: Ok delicious that's it, I finish.
Restaurant lady: You ordered two orange chicken?
Restaurant lady: And two spring role
Pranker: Big boy I tell you already that's it, I grombinded
Pranker: THAT’S IT!
Restaurant lady: [chuckles]excuse me, but I don- I think, what you saying order
Pranker: Like a-SOMEBOOOOOOOOOOOOOODEEE finish! Ok, how mu-
Restaurant lady: BUT ARE YOU COMING HERE, OKAY?
Pranker: How m-money ok, that's it I wanted, two orange-
Restaurant lady: You coming I coming I talk to you, okay?
Pranker: Look here big boy I want to s*ck your c*ck today
Pranker: I want TWO- orange chicken the two spring roll
Pranker: The delicious THAT'S IT!
Restaurant lady: Ok, you to order chicken two spring roll
Pranker: That’s it yeah.
Restaurant lady: Okay
Pranker: The- two Cokes, the big one, not the Asian one-
Restaurant lady: THE I DON’T HAVE TO TAKE ONE I DON'T WANT TO TAKE ONE for two Cokes
Pranker: Two Cokes, a regular size Coke, white boy Coke okay
Restaurant lady: That’s it, just by the can.......
Pranker: Okay good
Restaurant lady: Okay?
Pranker: Delicious, let's do it, how much money?
Restaurant lady: How much money?
Pranker: How much I owe you today? Big boy
Restaurant lady: I call it $28.14.
Pranker: 28?! That's so much money! Ok... I come right now
Pranker: With the CASH money today, I pay you with a hundred dollar bill, ok?
Restaurant lady: Are you coming here okay? You come here I talk to you
Pranker: Do you have change for hundred dollar bill?
Restaurant lady: Mm yeah do you coming here, ok?
Pranker: Ok, five minutes, the food be ready?
Restaurant lady: You come here first
Pranker: Do you tell me the five minute the food be ready?
Restaurant lady: NOOO NO NO FIVE MINUTE
Pranker: Well how, how much time? I need to know
Restaurant lady: [mumbling] about ten fifteen minutes
Pranker: [mumbling] how much money? Ten minutes?
Restaurant lady: TEN MINUTES
Pranker: OK, ten minutes I be there the food, better be ready in the bag
Pranker: With uh chopstick up your aaa-uh ok?
Restaurant lady: [mumbling] You know, what is?
Pranker: You want to rape me?
Restaurant lady: No you [mumbling] I-I-I-I am TOUGH STEAK
Pranker: I don't understand you......
Restaurant lady: [mumbling] you know what I did?
Pranker: That's not English
Restaurant lady: Eww WHAT MY I AM [mumbling] FIVE MINUTES MEAL
Pranker: Can I speak to somebody that can speak vietnamese, please?
Restaurant lady: No there's nobody here now
Restaurant lady: I’m closed, I’m closing five minutes
Pranker: Ok five minutes, I come right now
Pranker: I take the razor scooter and I come rush
Restaurant lady: YEAH YEAH WHAT YOU KNOW YPU KNOW WHERE RIGHT?
Pranker: You know here a day?
Restaurant lady: You know here a day?
Pranker: What the hell do you say ma’am? I don’t get it
Restaurant lady: YOU KNOW WHAT, THING I’M NEW TRY SPEAKING NOW YOU KNOW WHAT DAY?
Pranker:... Yes. Yes. I do.
Restaurant lady: You know why what I close.
Pranker: Ok, I come, the do you want the your address?!
Restaurant lady: Yeah
Pranker: LIKE A SOMEBOOOOOOOOOODEE ok, I give it to you let me pull out the paper
Restaurant lady: You know what adress
Pranker: I know it, I come in the navigation system today
Pranker: I very twenty first century technology
[confused asian stammering]
Pranker: I come to you ten minutes, okay?
Restaurant lady: Okay
Pranker: Okay, love you
Restaurant lady: Thank you bye.
Pranker: You love me too? Say it.
Restaurant lady: Yeah yeah yeah I love you
Pranker: SAY IT!
Restaurant lady: OKAY BYE BYE
Pranker: Say it...
Restaurant lady: Okay?!
Pranker: Say you love me big boy
Restaurant lady: Thank you, BYE!
Pranker: What the heck? [laughing]