Category: Prank Call
Prank Victim: Drug dealer
Rage Level: Moderate
- “You wanna meet at Little Caesar’s and talk about it over a hot ‘n ready pizza?”
- “You crip walkin’ all over my godd*** toes”
- “Nah I wanna run my mouth a little bit longer and then we’ll meet up”
Body of content:
I prank called a drug dealer as Tyrone and told him I want a percentage of his sales for 'selling on my turf'. He goes into complete panic mode when he starts realizing that Tyrone has a ton of information on him - all provided to me by the prank requester of course! Things really get heated when I make him believe that I’ll kidnap his girlfriend if he doesn’t pay up.
When his protective instincts over his girlfriend kicked in, he was so determined to turn me into the police that he forgot he’d be implicating himself! That “ohh yeaahh” moment when he realizes a drug dealer probably shouldn’t go to the police over a turf war is priceless! Do you think this call scared him into quitting? Tell me in the comments below!
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Drug dealer: Hello?
Tyrone: Ay yo, Smiley, what's up, man? ['Smiley' is the nickname he uses when selling drugs]
Drug dealer: Who's this?
Tyrone: It's Tyrone, uh, I-, I-,
Drug dealer: Tyrone?
Tyrone: I don't think you know me right now, but, uh, you know, in, in, recent weeks
Tyrone: I've been keeping an eye on you and it seems, like uh, you been selling on MA TURF. You
Drug dealer: Oh yeah?
Tyrone: You, you, you be pushing some PRODUCT, yeahh. So, uh, you know I see you on Market Street
Tyrone: ['Market Street' is right beside his home], I see you and your girl [phone button sound] up at the
Tyrone: Little Caesars, [His GF works at Little Caesars]. You know, I, I, I wanna let you uhh
Drug dealer: Mhm?
Tyrone: Keep doing your THING, but I'm gonna need a little ALLOWANCE
Tyrone: So I wanted to talk to you about that-.
Drug dealer: Uhh, why don't you come to my house right now?
Tyrone: No, but-, le, le, let's talk NUMBERS. We'll meet up
Drug dealer: NO, LET'S NOT TALK NUMBERS, LET'S TALK FACE TO FACE
Tyrone: AY YO, LISTEN UP HERE HABIBI [He's Middle Eastern], I'M NOT PLAYING NO GAMES BOY, TELLING ME FACE TO FACE
Drug dealer: No I'm not even
Tyrone: I-, I-, I-, alright.
Drug dealer: I'm not playing games with you, who, who?
Drug dealer: WHO ARE YOU?
Drug dealer: WHO ARE YOU ANYWAYS?
Tyrone: Alright, I CAN GET YOU IN A WHOLE WORLD OF TROUBLE "SMILEY"
Tyrone: DON'T FARK WITH ME. YOU TELLING ME "OH COME TO MY HOUSE"
Tyrone: TRYING TO THROW HANDS RIGHT NOW OR WHAT YOU WANNA DO?
Drug dealer: I wanna know who's talking to me. That's it.
Tyrone: Usually when I meet somebody up it's to KILL THEM. So like
Tyrone: I don't wanna meet up with you right now. I don't think that's necessary.
Drug dealer: Err
Tyrone: So uhh, you, you, you ready to NEGOTIATE a cut or like WHAT'S GOOD?
Drug dealer: Why don't we meet up first?
Tyrone: Alright, you wanna meet at Little Caesars
Drug dealer: Talk about it?
Tyrone: A, a, and talk about it over a HOT AND READY PIZZA?
Drug dealer: Hot and Ready Pizza? [He is currently pooping himself because I know all this info]
[He is currently pooping himself because I know all this info]
Drug dealer: Uhm, what's that supposed to mean?
Tyrone: I'M SAYING LIKE, DO YOU WANNA, W, W, if you wanna meet up SOMEWHERE, maybe somewhere
Tyrone: You'll feel COMFORTABLE, is, is, is your girlfriend's working place.
Tyrone: I was making a SUGGESTION
Drug dealer: Why you bringing my girlfriend, wh, why you, why you-, bringing my girlfriend into this?
Tyrone: Uhh, it's just a little FRIENDLY REMINDER MY DAWG is that. I know what's going on.
Drug dealer: HEY! HEY! EVEN, EVEN, EVEN IF I WANTED TO DO BUSINESS WITH YOU. YOU DON'T BRING
Drug dealer: MY GIRLFRIEND INTO IT.
Tyrone: Alright, IF YOU DON'T WANNA DO BUSINESS WITH ME, it's gonna cause SOME PROBLEMS
Drug dealer: Listen, I'm not trying to get aggressive or nothing, alright? I'LL JUST FARKING STOP SELLING
Drug dealer: IF IT THAT WHAT HAS TO BE, alright? It's just that you're not gonna force me do nothing
Drug dealer: That I don't want to
Tyrone: But no, but thing is, I, I got, I got the evidence MY DAWG. We gonna need BACK PAYMENTS
Drug dealer: It's just-, don't threaten me.
Tyrone: DAWG! I'm, I'm, I told you man, it's just one of my cards you know what I’m saying?
Tyrone: Y, Y, you stepping on MY TOES, I don't, I wasn't stepping ON YOUR TOES.
Drug dealer: I'm not stepping on, I don't, [Yelling] WHO ARE YOU?
Tyrone: MY TOES ARE SORE, MOTHERFARKA
Drug dealer: WHO ARE YOU?
Tyrone: MY TOES ARE MOTHERFARKING
Drug dealer: [Yelling] HOW AM I STEPPING ON YOUR TOES, IF I DON'T KNOW WHO ARE YOU?
Tyrone: You quit walking all over my GODMAN TOES WITH WHAT YOU DOING IN THAT NEIGHBOURHOOD, OKAY?
Tyrone: ON MARKET STREET, I KNOW WHA-, WHAT'S GOING ON DAWG. I WILL SEND TWO MOTHERFARKERS TO GO SNATCH
Tyrone: YOUR GIRL AT MOTHERFARKING LITTLE CAESARS BOY
Drug dealer: HEY, YOU KNOW WHAT? GO FARK YOURSELF.
Tyrone: LISTEN, BITCH, WE GOT TO TALK ABOUT THIS
Drug dealer: HEY NO, YOU LISTEN, YOU LISTEN, HEY, I WAS GONNA
Tyrone: HEY, uhh
Drug dealer: I WAS GONNA TALK TO YOU, I WAS TALK TO YOU AND BE REASONABLE WITH YOU, BUT YOU'RE TRYING BRING MY
Drug dealer: GIRLFRIEND INTO IT AND BLACKMAIL ME AND THREATEN ME AND SHIT
Drug dealer: GO FARK YOURSELF
Tyrone: OKAY, I'M FARK YOUR
Drug dealer: I'LL FARKING HEY
Tyrone: I'M FARK YOUR BITCH
Drug dealer: HEY I'LL FARK, LISTEN TO ME, LISTEN TO ME, I'M GOING, I'M WALKING STRAIGHT TO THE FARKING
Drug dealer: POLICE DEPARTMENT RIGHT NOW
Tyrone: MAKE SURE YOU TELL THEM YOU'RE SELLING DRUGS TOO, RIGHT? MAKE SURE YOU LET THEM KNOW THAT LIKE
Tyrone: YOU BEEN PUSHING PRODUCT, BECAUSE I'M SURE THAT'S GONNA REALLY HELP YOUR CASE
Drug dealer: Oh, yeah, listen to me. How about you stop trying to blackmail me
Tyrone: HOW ABOUT
Drug dealer: And stop threatening me
Tyrone: JUST WORK WITH ME, I'M I'M TRYING, I'M TRYING TO NEGOTIATE MY DAWG, I DIDN'T EVEN GIVE YOU NUMBERS YET
Tyrone: AND YOU AIN'T-
Drug dealer: NO, NO, YOU'RE NOT IF THIS IS HEY, YOUR'RE NOT, YOU'RE NOT GONNA GO ANYWHERE, YOU'RE NOT, YOU'RE NOT GETTING ANYWHERE
Drug dealer: IF YOU'RE GONNA THREATEN ME AND TELL ME YOU'RE GONNA GO SNATCH MY BITCH, NO.
Tyrone: I want 30 PERCENT.
Drug dealer: THIRTY PERCENT OF WHAT?
Tyrone: Thirty percent of all REVENUES, I was gonna come at you with FORTY FIVE, but I'm trying to be nice to you.
Tyrone: Right? I'm trying to be nice to you if you keep raising that voice, it's going up to forty.
Tyrone: MAN I AIN'T TRYING FARKING MAKE CRAP MORE COMPLICATED THAN IT
Drug dealer: [HANG UP]
Pranker: [Laughing] Dude, this really farking funny reaction, I hope he answers, before like he gets in to some trouble]
Drug dealer: Hey.
Tyrone: Look man, I think we got off on the wrong foot, alright? So I'm trying like
Drug dealer: GOT ON THE WRONG FOOT, RIGHT FOOT. Listen to me.
Drug dealer: Threaten me, tell me you're gonna fark my bitch, if I don't give you percentage of what I sell BLAH BLAH BLAH
Drug dealer: This guy. Alright. HE HITS ME UP AND HE'S LIKE "LISTEN I KNOW YOU'RE SELLING, I KNOW YOUR LITTLE, LITTLE NAME
Drug dealer:... BLAH BLAH BLAH" HE'S LIKE " I KNOW YOUR GIRL WORKS AT LITTLE CAESARS, I'M GO FARK HER IF YOU DON'T GO GIVE ME
Drug dealer:... FARKING PERCENTAGE, I HAVE VIDEOS OF YOU, I HAVE PICTURES OF YOU, I KNOW YOU WERE UP IN TOLEDO"
Drug dealer:... ACTING LIKE HE KNOWS EVERYTHING, I GOT A PHONE CALL UPSTAIRS RECORDED ON HIM
Tyrone: Alright, t-, t-, that's fine, that's fine, I, I, I ain't worried about the recording
Tyrone: Phone call dawg, I got mad recordings man. I'm telling you DAWG, I can get you ass deported
Drug dealer: Okay, YOU THINK I CARE
Tyrone: In like FIFTEEN MINUTES DAWG
Tyrone: I can go, I
Drug dealer: YOU THINK I CARE
Tyrone: IN THE TIME-
Drug dealer: IF I GET DEPORTED, I GET DEPORTED, YOU'RE STAYING HERE DUDE, YOU'RE STAYING HERE
Drug dealer: I DON'T GIVE A FARK ABOUT... WHATEVER YOU THINK I CARE ABOUT
Tyrone: Do you not think
Drug dealer: YOU HAVE TO STAY HERE
Tyrone: You think you
Drug dealer: IN THIS COUNTRY
Tyrone: Can't get locked up?
Drug dealer: I DON'T HAVE TO
Tyrone: You think you can't get locked up?
Drug dealer: HUH?
Tyrone: You think you can't get locked up here?
Drug dealer: Hey-, LET ME GET LOCKED UP, WHY, WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN AFTER?
Tyrone: YOU GET YOUR ASS BUTTFARKED, that's what happens.
Drug dealer: Oh, yeah. I don't fark, I don't play like you
Tyrone: No man, you-, I'm telling you, you-, you are going to get your ASS LOCKED UP
Tyrone: THEY'RE GOING TO SEE YOUR LITTLE BITCHASS
Drug dealer: [Yelling] YOU'RE GONNA, YOU'RE GONNA MEET ME OR YOU GONNA KEEP RUNNING YOUR MOUTH?
Tyrone: NO LET, I WANNA RUN MY MOUTH A LITTLE BIT LONGER, AND THEN WE'LL MEET UP. Alright?
Tyrone: SO LIKE I SAID, YOU CAN'T BE
Drug dealer: [Hang up]
Tyrone: STEPPING ON- SOMETHING
Drug dealer: Hello?
Tyrone: Hey yo HABIBI, I GOT TO TELL YOU SOMETHING MAN, one last thing alright?
Drug dealer: Huh?
Tyrone: HABIBI, one last thing before you go, alright?
Drug dealer: Mhmm?
Pranker: This is just a joke [laughing]
Drug dealer: Oh yeah? Who are you?
Tyrone: Yeah, it's just, one of your boys set up a prank call, to fark with you and gave us all
Pranker: That information about you, uhh, I'm a voice actor
Drug dealer: Who is he?
Drug dealer: Who is he? Wait what-, no, seriously because I already called the cops
Pranker: Oh you did? Damn, that's too bad, what'd you tell them?
Drug dealer: DAMN IT! HEY
Pranker: Well, I mean if you a-
Drug dealer: Oh my god..
Pranker: If you actually called the cops, you might wanna call them real quick and tell them that somebody
Pranker: Played a prank on you
Pranker: [Laughing] You know I was just trying to teach Smiley a little lesson, I think his career of selling
Pranker: Drugs is officially over.