Category: Gas station prank, prank call
Characters: Buk Lau
Prank Victim: 7-Eleven
Rage Level: Moderate
- “You are being the butthole lady to me!”
- “You very confucius, you know?”
- “How DARE YOU make fun of my TOOTSIE ROLL?!”
Body of content:
Buk Lau put his negotiating skills to the test in this 7-Eleven prank call! Every year on July 11th (7/11), the convenience store chain offers free slurpees at all of its locations across the US for “National Slurpee Day”. I called poorly rated locations as Buk Lau to complain they didn’t have the coke flavor slurpee when he came on 7/11, so he’d like to come back another day and claim his free coke flavored slurpee.
Each location I called was totally thrown off by Buk’s request, and also had plenty of trouble deciphering what he was complaining about! It lead to some funny conversations with the employees that I included in this compilation. Should I try another 7-Eleven prank on 7/11? Which character should call them next time? Tell me in the comments below!
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Employee: Thank you for calling 7/11
Pranker [speaking as Buk Lau]: Uh, d-du hello? How you doing today?
Pranker: Ok! I come in the on the July 11th to get the FREE SLURPEE but you guys don't have the, uh...
Pranker: ... the Coke flavor in stock? And I wondering if I can come in today?
Pranker: Since you guys do the fark up and get the uh Slurpee for free?
Employee: You want to get free Slurpee today? I don't see that happening.
Pranker: Uh, but- BUT WHY NOT?
Employee: No, because we had one day free slurpees that was it.
Pranker: But I know! I come in to get the free slurpee!
Pranker: But you guys don't have the Coke in stock.
Employee: Uh, we did too have the cups inside the stock.
Pranker: No, no, no! You don't have the Coke in stock!
Employee: No, we had the cups.
Employee: I'm telling you.
Pranker: Look I am not talking about the cup! Okay I talking about the Coke in stock!
Employee: Okay well, either way we-
Employee: You should've came up that day and you would've have a free slurpee so...
Pranker: No I- I can't-
Employee: You can't come up today.
Pranker: Okay listen to me. I-I-
Employee: No. I'm telling you-
Pranker: Okay but WHY NOT YOU LISTEN? Look, I tell you, big boy!
Pranker: I-I-I come in to get the slurpee but the uh, THE FLAVOR is not in stock!
Pranker: You know, the Coke not in stock.
Employee: Yeah, well then I can't help you with that either way
Employee: You're still not coming in today and getting a free slurpee.
Pranker: But you guy! But you guy do the fark up! But I can't-
Employee: You're not coming in today to get a free slurpee.
Pranker: But explain to me why no-
Employee: I'm telling you why!
Pranker: Why you so stingy! You know?
Employee: Because we had one day of a free slurpee. That's it!
Pranker: But you gu- YOU GUY PLAY-
Employee: You have a great day!
Pranker: But you guys play the game! You know? Hello?
Pranker [to audience]: She's not having it!
Employee: ... calling 7/11.
Pranker: Uh, duh yeah! Telephone got disconnect I think!
Employee: It didn't- No it didn't get disconnected, I hung the phone up-
Pranker: But th-
Employee: You're not coming in to get a free slurpee today. That's it.
Pranker: But- Did you hear what is- DO YOU HEAR WHAT I TELL YOU?
Employee: I heard what you said! AND YOU'RE STILL NOT COMING IN TO GET A FREE slurpee TODAY!
Pranker: But-But you did not have it! Okay I know what you guys do!
Pranker: You try to play the game! You say free slurpee today,
Pranker: but then you don't have the actual slurpee in available! You know? What do I do it?
Employee: First of all I can't understand what you're saying so...
Employee: You're not coming in to get a free slurpee. That's it.
Pranker: How much money you going to lose if you give me a cup of a slurpee right?
Pranker: What's the-
Employee: You ARE NOT COMING IN TO GET A FREEE slurpee.
Pranker: But why WHY ARE YOU SO-
Employee: YOU'RE NOT. And don't call back!
Pranker: K. BIG BOOOY! Don't be like s-
Employee: Don't call back. Goodbye!
Pranker: Don't be like a STUPID
[phone call ends]
Pranker [to audience]: Well let's be honest, I'm gonna call back.
Employee: Thank you for calling 7/11.
Pranker: I don't know how the telephone keep getting disconnect!
Employee: Because I keep hanging the phone up.
Pranker: But- W-what?!
Employee: Because I keep trying to get to you that you're not coming in to get a free slurpee!
Pranker: But you-you are being th-
Employee: This is the last time I'm telling you!
Pranker: Look you are being the a*****e lady to me!
Employee: I'm being an a*****e, really?
Pranker: You are!
Employee: Oh, okay well you know what?
Pranker: But don't be lie-
[phone call ends]
Pranker: I keep be on the break of laughter!
Employee2: Good afternoon, 7/11.
Pranker: Uh, duh yeah! I-I come in the other day to get the uh, free slurpee...
Pranker: ... on the 7/11 day. And I- you- you guy don't have the flavor I like it in stock.
Pranker: SO can I come in today to get the slurpee please?
Employee2: You have to pay for it.
Pranker: Uh, but the last time I come you guys, you don't have the Coke in stock!
Employee2: There was no pop?
Pranker: No, the Coke was empty.
Employee2: We have a plenty of cups out.
Pranker: No, NOT THAT, the cup. The Coke! The Coke. The drink.
Employee2: I can't give you a free slurpee if...
Employee2: ... if the pop was out, and you left!
Pranker: But I know but you don't have the Coke in stock.
Pranker: So what am I going to do? It's my favorite one! Everybody has a Coke.
Pranker: In stock. Usual- The 7/11 always have the fla-
Employee2: Ma'am we have plenty of cups here. We still have-
Pranker: No, ah, LOOK! I am not talking-
Employee2: 1200 left over!
Pranker: No, not the cup! Okay, the Coke! The Coke, the drink! Coke.
Employee2: Yeah, THE CUPS!
Pranker: No! [exhales angrily]
Pranker: Th-the Coke!
Pranker: The C-O-C- eh, th-the C-O-K-E. You know?
Employee2: Oh, the Coke!
Pranker: The right! The Coke!
Employee2: Yeah, we have 2 bibs going.
Pranker: No, I-I waiting for the Coke but nobody have it! So I want to...
Pranker: I want to come today to get the free slurpee instead!
Employee2: Yeah, you can get the Coke, but we have to charge you for the cups!
Pranker: But-but WHY? What is going to happen if you do it?
Pranker: You gonna get the fire or something?
Employee2: No, I'm...
Pranker: EXACTLY! Nothing will happen!
Employee2: We have Coke's running right now, it's fine!
Pranker: Nobody-nobody has to know! I won't tell anybody!
Employee2: No, but I'm on camera and they'll see me do it!
Pranker: Okay I come in there, I will buy a- I will buy a SNICKER BAR or something with it...
Pranker: ... and then you don't charge me for the slurpee. What do you think?
Employee2: I think you still have to pay for the slurpee.
Pranker: BUT THE CAMERA WON'T KNOW, YOU KNOW? It's not that smart.
Employee2: The camera's always on, it will always know.
Pranker: No, but it's going to know, he don't charge charge for the slurpee!
Pranker: [imitating alarm] ALARM GO OFF or something?
Employee2: Ma'am, I'm done talking to you.
Pranker: But- Ha- [phone call ends]
Employee3: ... 7/11?
Pranker: Uh the yeah, I try to come in the other day on the, uh...
Pranker: July 11th to get a free slurpee, but you guys don't have the, uh...
Pranker: ... the flavor I like it in stock, so I want to know...
Pranker: ... can I come in today and get a slurpee, please?
Employee3: Yeah, I have no way of confirmation that uh, you came in or anything like that, so-
Pranker: I know but you can-you can take my word for it you know?
Pranker: It's only like one slurpee, it costing you like what 10 cent or something?
Employee3: [fake laughing]
Employee3: I-I mean- I don't know... I guess, I guess, I don't-
Employee3: I couldn't say something like that and then, you know...
Pranker: But what?! You very confusing you know?
Employee3: We've got a bit of a line and I mean I don't really know how to help you.
Pranker: Okay, do you want me to call you back in like, 5 minutes?
Employee3: Yes, yes, please.
Pranker: Okay, alright... I call you then.
Employee3: Okay, okay. Thank you, bye.
Pranker:Uh, yes I'm BAAACK. How you doing today?
Employee3: Yeah... I'm okay.
Pranker: Okay, great-
Employee3: Um, okay so I just wanna make sure that I understand your question.
Employee3: You're asking if you can come up here and get a free one
Employee3: because we didn't have the flavor that you wanted on the free slurpee day?
Pranker: But ye-yeah the flavor I wanted was the- it's a melted or something,
Pranker: it was not ready you know? So I come in, I very sad boy...
Pranker: I had to leave, I very very crying you know? Very upset me!
Employee3: Uhm, okay well, I have no way of confirming that you came in.
Employee3: Not trying to be impudent or anything like that I just-
Pranker: I know, I know, but I'm a very
Employee3: I don't know-
Pranker: I'm a very honest person you know? You don't have to-
Employee3: Well, I mean... Any-anybody can claim that.
Employee3: I'm not-I'm not again I'm not trying to be-
Pranker: Why you-why you have to insult me you know?
Pranker: I- if you come into my Chinese restaurant and you say "I come I want to get the eggroll",
Pranker: and I don't have it I give to you 2 for free! Not even one.
Employee3: Ma'am, I'm not in charge in like, creating the policies-
Pranker: Can I talk to like a someboodee who can help me then?
Employee3: Try again, I'm not trying to be impudent but I really have no way of confirming what you did!
Pranker: You calling me impotent! You make fun-
Employee3: I didn't say- I di- I'm not calling you impotent, it's IMPUDENT.
Employee3: I'm not trying to be rude-
Pranker: OH MY GOD! YOU TRY TO MAKE FUN OF ME!
Employee3: I'm not- ma'am, I have to let you go if you-
Employee3: if you want to raise a complaint-
Pranker: Look you very upset me-
Employee3: Sorry for -
Pranker: You know? You have to- you make fun of my tootsie roll you know!
Employee3: I'm making [stammering] Ma'am, please.
Employee3: I don't have anything else that I could do for you
Pranker: How dare you! How dare you make fun of my tootsie roll-
Pranker: I am very self conscious you know?
Employee3: Self conscious of- ma'am okay are you...
Pranker: You th-
Pranker: I cannot-I cannot believe it, you know?
Employee3: [clears throat]
Pranker: You make fun of my tootsie, I don't ever talk to you like that.
Employee3: Okay, I got to let you go. Alright? Have a nice day!
Pranker: Why?! WHY DO YOU HURT ME?
Pranker [to audience]: Why do you call me impotent? [laughing]