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  1. 02-06-2009, 05:44 PM #41
    ryan
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    Today, I fell asleep. I felt something on my face. I batted it away. It was my hamster. It died from a concussion upon hitting the wall. FML
    Last edited by ryan; 02-06-2009 at 05:50 PM.
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  2. 02-06-2009, 06:11 PM #42
    colleen_rofl
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    Today, my girlfriend was about to give me a blowjob. When her lips met my dick, there was a huge static shock. I never got the blowjob, she is still laughing and i have ice on my penis. FML
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  3. 02-06-2009, 10:11 PM #43
    Ms. Leading
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    One of my co-workers told me that my boss google searched me and was looking at my pictures. FML.
    .

    stickam .//. myspace .//. twitter
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  4. 02-06-2009, 10:42 PM #44
    talladega
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    Today, my anatomy teacher was putting together a skeleton model for class. He had misplaced the leg bone, so I thoughtfully asked, "What's the matter, lose a leg?" Unfortunately, there's nothing thoughtful about asking that question to a guy with an amputated leg. FML
    I shall pour Liquid Nitrogen into your anal cavity.
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  5. 02-07-2009, 12:40 AM #45
    xxfortneyface
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    Today, I went to my boyfriend’s work to surprise him. When I got there, I called him on his phone to tell him to turn around. I saw him look at his phone. His co-worker next to him asked who that was. He replied, “Just this fat chick I know”. FML
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  6. 02-07-2009, 01:24 PM #46
    MrDAB
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    Quote Originally Posted by julihudson View Post
    One of my co-workers told me that my boss google searched me and was looking at my pictures. FML.
    Hahahaha. How did that turn out?
    This post has been approved by MrDAB

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  7. 02-08-2009, 05:35 PM #47
    Ms. Leading
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    He likes me more I think?

    > . >
    .

    stickam .//. myspace .//. twitter
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  8. 02-08-2009, 05:36 PM #48
    Kretus
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    Quote Originally Posted by julihudson View Post
    He likes me more I think?

    > . >
    good!!!
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  9. 02-08-2009, 11:11 PM #49
    fashox
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    Today, I sucked dick for crack. FML
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  10. 02-09-2009, 12:40 AM #50
    surfnakd23
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    [QUOTE=julihudson;72999]He likes me more I think?

    oh hell yea. lucky bitch. get that raise.
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  11. 02-09-2009, 06:20 AM #51
    michael
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    Quote Originally Posted by julihudson View Post
    One of my co-workers told me that my boss google searched me and was looking at my pictures. FML.
    its funny cause the first thing that comes up is you in a wet t shirt contest. OWNT!




    I am gay, except for Alex, I'd hit it.
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  12. 02-09-2009, 07:28 PM #52
    Nimrod
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    Today, this guy took me to Denny's on a first date and used a 2 for 1 coupon. It was expired. I paid. FML
    Quote Originally Posted by nickspohn View Post
    i fucking run the gay train.
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  13. 02-09-2009, 07:56 PM #53
    Kretus
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    Quote Originally Posted by michaeldollarsign View Post
    its funny cause the first thing that comes up is you in a wet t shirt contest. OWNT!
    how do u know???
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  14. 02-10-2009, 10:13 PM #54
    xxfortneyface
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    haha owned


    Today, while in our communal showers in the highschool football locker room, I started to swing my penis around because it feels good and I was alone. Two minutes later the rest of the team hops into the shower with me. 30 dudes, one self-induced boner. FML.
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  15. 02-11-2009, 02:26 PM #55
    michael
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kretus View Post
    how do u know???
    cause i googled her.




    I am gay, except for Alex, I'd hit it.
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  16. 02-11-2009, 02:30 PM #56
    Tactic
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    Quote Originally Posted by michaeldollarsign View Post
    cause i googled her.
    Everyone's googled her and found the wet tshirt pics (:
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  17. 02-11-2009, 09:12 PM #57
    kat
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    lol i enjoyed reading these..

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  18. 02-12-2009, 06:49 AM #58
    dylan
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    I just decided to shave my nuts, I used my brothers electric razor. It worked, but I have a bunch of little cuts on my nuts now. FML
    Quote Originally Posted by Armani View Post
    dylan wins.
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  19. 02-13-2009, 01:31 AM #59
    xxfortneyface
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    Today, I listened to my room mate having sex from 3 A.M. until 6 A.M. When I looked over at my girlfriend, who must have thought I was sleeping, I noticed she was masturbating. FML
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  20. 02-13-2009, 04:34 AM #60
    surfnakd23
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    so this girl that was just over was DTF... I couldnt see it for shit. FML
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